Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize