she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize