I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize