im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just want to make out with him forever
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
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