oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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