ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
