Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize