I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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