God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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