stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
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