If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
