Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
