so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
