And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize
