his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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