Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Randomize