Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
