He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
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