dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
she told me i tasted like america
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Congratulations! We have a period
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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