I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You ruined the universe
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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