Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
