I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize