why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize