i permit you to call me
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize