Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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