Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
