walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
So many bounce houses so little time
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
