He is such a slut. More and more my type.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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