I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She even gives head with a lisp.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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