She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
