My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
