Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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