the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
