Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
