my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
