I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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