She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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