Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
