all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
