I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
