I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
