You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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