did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
