this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
