champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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