is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
