she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
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