A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize