I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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