I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize
