Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
